Updated: Feb 17
Alina is 56 years old. She lives in the US. She is a psychiatrist by training and is married to a kind man.
When I ask her what her most recurring negative thought is, she tells me “Things are not going to turn out well today.”
She says she has this thought practically every single day right after she wakes up, when she’s still in bed. As a result, she feels like turning over in bed and just going back to sleep.
When I ask her when was the very first time she had this thought she closes her eyes and very quickly she remembers: “It was the second day of kindergarten. I had gone to kindergarten for the first time the day before and had a very bad experience. I had been so excited to go, but I was met by a group of mean girls who made fun of me and called me names.”
I asked her “how old were you?”. She said “4 years old”. I continue: “where were you when you had this thought and what happened next?” She said: “I was in my bed. Had just woken up and immediately felt like turning over in my bed and going back to sleep.”
Do you realize what has happened? Alina experienced a trauma at the age of 4 and 52 years later, she is STILL experiencing the EXACT same feeling and having the EXACT same thoughts and the EXACT same reaction!
This is what a trauma is: it’s an emotional overwhelm that literally gets engraved in our subconscious mind and when triggered, we RELIVE it with the SAME intensity for the rest of our lives.
You see, for the subconscious mind there is no past nor future. There is only the present. So, every time the trauma is triggered, we experience it as if it was happening in the present!
Once Alina had the realization of where this morning anxiety was coming from, she could now change it.
Because the problem is never what actually happened. The problem is the conclusion we reached personally out of the experience.
For example, another girl could have experienced the same thing and said to herself the next morning: “there are some awful girls in that class. I’m going to avoid them and seek out the nice ones. I’m sure there are some.”
And this is the second part of the session: In Alina’s case, I guided her to RELIVE the traumatic situation, draw a different conclusion, and then program the new thoughts in her mind and finally internalize the new feelings.
From that day on, as soon as she wakes up, her new thought is: "Today is a new day. God is with me. Many things can turn out well!" And her energy is no longer of wanting to escape, but on the contrary, of expectation, curiosity and joy!
This is what the Bible refers to when it says: “You shall know the truth and the truth shall set you free”.
If you want to find out the truth about what’s holding YOU back, then set up a breakthrough coaching session with me here: www.emotional-strength.com/appointment
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